#2 – How Did I Recover from Borderline Personality Disorder?

People reading this page are probably searching for hope and encouragement, either because they have problems related to Borderline Personality Disorder or they care about someone who does. Or, perhaps they are simply curious and wonder whether BPD can be recovered from.

On this page, I will describe what allowed me to move from being an emotionally immature young person, suffering from many painful borderline symptoms, to being the relatively mature, functional, and symptom-free adult that I am today.

When I Was “Severely Borderline” – Teenage and Young Adult Years

From approximately ages 13-23, I was severely emotionally ill. I had the following symptoms, most of which are in the DSM-IV definition of BPD:

– Severe anxiety and depression most of the time, with little ability to comfort myself.
– Constant feelings of emptiness and low self-esteem.
– Acting out in various ways, especially overeating.
– Viewing other people and myself as all good or all bad, accompanied by childlike clinging toward the “good” people and extreme rage against the “bad” people.

– Very poor personal relationships in terms of their emotional depth – I had no real friends and tended to use people for my needs and then quickly lose interest in them.
– No clear identity or long-term goals – I usually only planned a few days or weeks ahead.
– A tendency to be paranoid and fear that other people were “out to get me”.
– Intense fear of losing important family members (fear of abandonment).
– Suicidal thinking when I became very depressed.

These symptoms persisted relatively constantly for 10 years starting in middle school. It is difficult to describe in words how painful or frustrating they were. Externally, I tried to appear normal and to function in school and work, but internally it was a constant emotional nightmare. I felt myself to be cursed, a walking example of Murphy’s Law, existing in a personal hell on earth. When first working on recovery, I had no idea where to go. Emotionally, I felt like a cork caught in the waves of a stormy sea.

My Progress Toward Being a Mature Adult Today

However, here is how I would describe myself today, at age 28:

– Able to regulate my feelings– I can comfort myself and rarely become anxious or depressed.
– Able to think in an ambivalent way, and to see others and myself as good and bad at once.
– Have confidence in myself, possessing a clear sense of what I want to do in work and relationships. I think long-term, able to plan months and years ahead.
– Able to feel genuine concern and interest in others, rather than only using them to satisfy my needs.

– Have had a good romantic relationship and several meaningful long-term friendships.
– No paranoid thinking, suicidal ideation, or fear of abandonment.
– Able to function independently in a job I enjoy; no need to cling to other people to function well.
– Have a strong core identity which persists through difficult times.
– Much reduced acting out – I still do occasionally overeat when under unusual stress at work, but it’s much less of a problem than before.

I am pretty happy with how my life is going today, and proud of myself for the work I did. How did I make these changes to develop a good life, and to lose almost all of my borderline symptoms?

What Helped Me Become Healthy and Non-Borderline

1) Long-term psychotherapy

Starting in my late teens, I was fortunate to be able to attend psychodynamic, psychoanalytically-informed psychotherapy. At first, I went once a week, and then for several years I went an average of twice a week, sometimes going three times a week during difficult periods. It was extremely expensive, and I was fortunate to have parental financial support to go to therapy (I later financed myself, sacrificing in other areas of my life so that I could go to therapy). Essentially, I used psychotherapy as a reparenting process in which I worked to be able to deeply trust someone else for the first time. My various therapists – I had four significant ones – provided me with crucial emotional support that allowed me to become independent in my job and to develop better interpersonal relationships. They were the substitute mothers for my emerging true self.

In other articles, I will discuss more extensively how and why therapy helped me, my views on therapy vs. medication, as well as options one has if one does not have the money to go to therapy initially (therapy is certainly not the only path to getting better, although it can be very valuable).

2) True friends

Starting in my late teens, I was fortunate to develop a close friendship with a man, Gareth, who knew about my history of physical abuse (my father beat me throughout my childhood). He was an older, middle-aged family man who I met via the shared interest we had in tennis. I took the risk of opening up to Gareth about my problems, and we developed a friendship that has endured to this day. We spent hundreds of hours talking through my past and present problems. There were many times I cried with him, as well as some periods when I became angry or paranoid and misunderstood his kind intentions. However, most of the time his support was extremely helpful, coming during a period of my life when I desperately needed love and understanding. I will be eternally grateful to Gareth for his decision to help me.

From about age 15 until the present day, I developed three other close friendships, with two men and one woman, all of whom helped me tremendously and gave me hope that life could get better. My relationships with Julian, Andrew, and Helena were similar in quality to the first one described above, in that I took the risk of opening up to these people, telling them my life story, and asking for help. However, they were not as deep or intense as the first one.

Today, I also have a number of other important friendships, but they are more “normal friends” that I enjoy for themselves and can share my present-day sense of self with. These friends do not know my history of being borderline in nearly as much depth as the four people I opened up to in my teens.

I will write more in another article about how genuinely opening up to another person for help is one of the most important risks a borderline person can take.

3) Family – My mother

Despite her faults, my mother supported me financially to go to psychotherapy, and she did genuinely care about me although it was difficult for me to feel that fact early on. She had a very difficult relationship with my father, and her decision when I was 18 to divorce him and live alone provided me with a stable, safe place to live for several years. As I became a young adult, I came to trust my mother more and risked talking to her openly about some of my problems. This occurred in parallel with my trusting and opening up to the friends noted above. To my mother’s credit, she matured along with me, becoming a supportive listener and a cheerleader for my developing independence. I owe much of what I am today to her heartfelt efforts to help me.

4) My passion – tennis

The one thing I always liked as a young child was the sport of tennis. I took group classes at the local club and viewed the coaches as substitute father-figures. The process of hitting the ball and running around with other children became addictive, and I developed an obsession with the pro game and players like Roger Federer. Perhaps surprisingly, this interest endured during my teens and early twenties even when I was struggling with all the horrible emotional symptoms associated with Borderline Personality Disorder.

Tennis had great value as something that distracted me from my emotional suffering during the most difficult periods, and had meaning for me in its own right. It also led me to work with children as an assistant coach in college, which eventually led to my present day job, in which I work with kids.

5) My own study of Borderline Personality Disorder

When I first learned about BPD, and later was diagnosed with it, I was terrified because of all the pessimistic descriptions about how difficult it was to help people with the diagnosis and how many therapists did not want to treat them. Online web forums were filled with horror stories about manipulative, evil, hopeless borderlines.

Over time, I researched BPD extensively and came to a more nuanced understanding of it. I understood it from a developmental perspective, meaning how traumatic childhood experience shapes later adult problems, as well as from an object-relations perspective, referring to how the traumatized individual uses psychological defenses and modes of relating that distort the external environment based on pathological internal views of themselves and others. More on that in later posts.

I studied the writing of many therapists who had successfully treated individuals with BPD, including Harold Searles, Vamik Volkan, Otto Kernberg, Heinz Kohut, Gerald Adler, James Masterson, Peter Giovacchini, Jeffrey Seinfeld, and others. I met Gerald Adler and James Masterson in person and interviewed them about their views on the treatability of BPD. From this research I developed an overall picture of what was necessary in the “big picture” for borderline individuals to become non-borderline. In essence, the traumatized person needed to learn to trust and accept support from another person, and to be helped via a therapeutic alliance to develop healthy adult ego functions that they never developed as a child. By around age 20-21, I understood BPD in more depth than many therapists do. Understanding it taught me what was necessary for a successful recovery process.

I will write much more about these issues in later articles, but for now, the point is that having a map of where to go when struggling with BPD helped immeasurably.

6) Eventually abandoning the concept of BPD

Paradoxically, I now no longer believe that Borderline Personality Disorder is a valid diagnosis. This is despite the fact that I was diagnosed with it, and have recovered from having almost all of its symptoms.

As I improved, I continued to be periodically worried or depressed by the idea that I was still a borderline. I would often fear that maybe the writers who said borderlines were untreatable and hopeless were right, that I would always be a borderline, and that if I did improve I would inevitably relapse.

Today, I view BPD as an archaic, outdated term, one fabricated by psychiatrists to (mis)label a wide range of severely abused and neglected people. To me, a more realistic view is that “borderline” symptoms exist on a continuum of severity, i.e. that there is no firm line that divides borderline from non-borderline. Looking back, it is obvious that as I recovered there was no past time at which I suddenly no longer “had” BPD, if I ever had it at all. Of course, I did have (and gradually stopped having) all of its symptoms, which were real and extremely painful.

Once I realized this, I experienced a paradigm shift in which I was no longer worried by the diagnosis of BPD, since I regarded it as invalid.

7) My curiosity, resilience, and aggression

By my nature, I have always been curious. This helped me when dealing with BPD, since it spurred me to extensively investigate the disorder and how it could be treated, as well as to eventually question its validity as a useful diagnosis.

Even more important, I am one tough cookie (I was going to use another word, but want to keep this blog’s language clean!). Starting in my early teens, I promised myself that I would get better or die trying. After reading about how borderlines often failed to improve, I defiantly predicted that I would recover. I weathered the long, slow storm of many years of depression, anxiety, rage, and uncertainty, never giving up despite times when things seemed hopeless.

Lastly, I can be a pretty direct and blunt person. Aggression is often regarded as a “bad” thing in our society, but aggressively seeking out the truth or defending oneself when under attack can be good things. My aggressive rejection of those who are pessimistic about BPD was important in my recovery. I’m not afraid to say what I really think, as you will see on this site!

These qualities are partly genetic. They certainly helped me with my challenges. Each person has their own strengths, and there are other ways in which I’m not as gifted as others. For other people working to recover from past trauma, it may be these or other strengths that are most useful on their journey.

 ——————

I welcome any correspondance at bpdtransformation@gmail.com

If you are struggling with BPD yourself or are trying to help a borderline individual, I would be happy to listen to your story and provide feedback if possible. Feel free to provide constructive criticism of this site also.

This article is the opinion of a non-professional layperson, and should not be taken as medical advice or as the view of a therapist who is professionally qualified to treat Borderline Personality Disorder or any other mental health condition. Readers should consult with a qualified mental health professional before undertaking any treatment.

– Edward Dantes

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31 thoughts on “#2 – How Did I Recover from Borderline Personality Disorder?

  1. z3nnn

    Thank you so much for having the courage to share your experiences about BPD. To hear recovery stories like yours shows there’s hope for this disorder and will undoubtedly be a beacon for others who suffer from it. I think in time with more people like you (and mahari, reiland) the experts will have to rewrite what they think is true. Thank you again for creating a blog to document your journey, it gives valuable clues and research into how to confront bpd head on.

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  2. bpdtransformation Post author

    Thank you for your kind comment. It’s truly astounding to see the level of distortion in our society about what BPD is and how treatable it really is. As noted elsewhere on this blog, a careful review of the many psychodynamic books written about “borderline” conditions makes it clear that many hundreds of formerly borderline patients have fully recovered to lead good, essentially normal lives. I am only one among many. Another main idea I hope people will take away is that BPD is a non-medical condition, and that its DSM diagnosis is invalid. That point is blindingly obvious, but it seems that psychiatry’s brainwashing is preventing many people from being able to understand it.

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  3. michelle

    This is crazy awesome. THANK you for creating this website and sharing your thoughts, findings and, most importantly, your journey. From you I take knowledge and hope to pull myself out of this sad place. Many, many blessings to you for your courage and kindness. (I am so blanking thrilled to not have to deal with meds!!!)

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Thank you for your kind words Michelle. I hope that you will be able to pull yourself out of the sad place soon. I’m also glad that you are doing better vis-a-vis the meds. Best of luck to you!

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  4. Nicole

    I have been so angry since I was diagnosed with BPD (fairly recently). Did you ever feel this way? I’m so angry with my mother that I can’t even talk about her. I am entering DBT therapy in two weeks. Do you have experience with that? If you wrote about it can you please point me to that post? Thanks.

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Hi Nicole,
      Thank you for your message. Yes, I did feel that the application of the BPD label was inappropriate, unhelpful, and harmful, and in the past I felt anger about it. I have only briefly tried DBT a long time ago. I think it is helpful, although IMO individual psychotherapy with a therapist who is experienced in working with people dealing with serious problems (often related to trauma/neglect/abuse) is more helpful over the long term than DBT. I haven’t written an article on DBT, no, but if you look at the list of articles, there are several that discuss types of treatment (psychodynamic being my bias) and give general recommendations on where to look for help (e.g. Article #5). I hope you will find something that’s at least a little bit helpful to you.

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  5. ramblingsfromamum

    I am an Australian mum. I found your blog on sensuousambervile. My daughter is 28, diagnosed about a year and a half ago. She attended a private DBT clinic, but now cannot, due to financial restrictions. She started taking Lexipro and this has helped her volatile moods. She can and does get anxious and irritated (as we all can) but she isn’t aggressive or violent now. I know as she does she, it is not the cure. It just takes the edge off. She has 7 of the 9 criteria. Not self harming or suicidal tendencies. She was brought up as was her sister, in a loving, caring environment. I’m tying to obtain some self skill set books in laymans terms for her to read, now that she’s not attending DBT.
    I have followed as I’m interested in all subject matter regarding BPD – thank you for writing.

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  6. Mishka

    I’m so glad I found your site. As someone with BPD who is on what seems like a never ending search and struggle to get these symptoms under control, its really refreshing to read such positive and motivating advice. I also believe it is 100% curable (on my good days lol) and with therapy (DBT and talk therapy) as well as daily work I’ve seen a huge difference, but still seems like so far to go. Maybe you made me think, I need to change my view? I agree with you that the diagnosis is faulty and have started to question it over the years – I know many non BP’s with BPD symptoms! What.. can they all have BPD? 😉 lol I remember years ago when I was first told the diagnosis I didn’t want to believe it. 3 diagnosis later I started to listen. But getting online and reading some of the things I did back than made me feel bleak. I hated my parents for it, thought I was cursed for life and that this was it for me lol there is so much bad information out there about BPD. I will be reading through your site and definitely recommending to others. Thank you 🙂

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Thank you for your kind message… I wish you all the best. Yes, “BPD” is “cureable” (overly medicalized word)… or said in another way, people can mature and significantly move beyond their emotional problems. Also you are quite right that “borderline” symptoms can occur to different degrees in anyone, from people who are psychotic to people are who usually “normal” but under a lot of stress. The continuum approach is more realistic than the diagnostic fantasy that there’s some sudden cut-off point at which one 5 randomly chosen symptoms of a certain threshold intensity that “makes” one borderline or non-borderline. Real life just ain’t like that.
      my best to you again

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  7. Concerned Mom

    I am mother of a 12 year old reactively attached adopted child. Extremely similar traits to BPD. What advice do you have when he starts exhibiting passive aggressiveness or his ‘hurt them harder than they hurt you’ behaviour. We talk a lot about emotions and situation interpretations and calming exercises and he gets it, but in the moment all is forgotten and he ends up suspended or in detentions.

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Hi, I don’t have specific advice because I don’t know your situation, But I recommend reading Jeffrey Seinfelds chapter on how to help borderline children in his book The Bad Object (chapter is “The Negative Therapeutic Reaction In the Treatment of Children”, especially the case of Robert). It should be on Amazon used books. also check out Efrain Bleibergs book, Understanding and Treating Personality Disorders in Children and Adolescents, especially the parts about how to create the helpful representational mismatches. Also, if therapy is a possibility and your child will accept it, a dependent trusting relationship with some reliable figure outside the family could help a lot.
      Good luck

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  8. Yehudis Rabinovitz

    First of all, thank you for keeping your blog clean! It is very much appreciated. There’s really no need to use unpleasant words in order to express strong emotions. English is a very rich language.
    I understand why you used the term “immature” to describe yourself in the pre-healing days, and agree in a certain sense – but I would qualify this and add that almost everyone today in society is immature, regardless of “mental health” status – and it’s people like you who struggle through adversity and are determined to gain maturity who are the exceptions. I think people who are supposedly emotionally healthy and never have to confront abuse/neglect to any significant degree, or who seem to manage okay without facing up to uncomfortable truths, remain “comfortably” immature their entire lives and society still calls them mature.
    Another thing: BPD has very bad press, and I think that one should distinguish between “BPD” sufferers who allow themselves to take out their difficulties on others via their own abusive behavior, and those who suffer in silence and don’t want to cause others suffering, even if they are so very angry at the world. This seems to me to be a question of personal ethics and morality, just like anyone else in the world without such a diagnosis. I can’t imagine from your writing that you were ever significantly aggressive or violent to others and I don’t agree that there’s an excuse for such behavior – people still have a choice, no matter what they’ve been through.
    Right now I’m seeing my teenage anorexia as a symptom of “BPD” (and like you I don’t agree with any kind of labeling). There’s a big moral difference between taking out all the frustration and disappointment on oneself and lashing out at others.
    I once had a neighbor who probably fit the BPD criteria and she set out to make my life a misery, succeeding in large part. I don’t think that she should be excused either because she is “mentally ill” or because of any abuse/neglect she might have suffered. But a diagnosis often serves as a convenient excuse and then it’s not surprising that BPD is seen as it is.
    Thank you for this site which has opened my eyes to many things, including the comment (in another article) that suggested that “BPD” is like the last step before slipping into schizophrenia. I wonder if you have any ideas on what causes a person to (want to) slip over the boundary between living in conscious and subconscious reality (the way I see it, and I have experience with it as my husband has had several psychotic episodes).
    Also, how can a person objectively size up his situation when it can seem that most people are rejecting – and then I wonder, really? Can it be, or is the problem in my perception? Even asking other people doesn’t really help unless it’s a skilled therapist (and I don’t have the funds for that) because people lie, even with the best intentions.
    Thank you again.

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Hi Yehudis,
      A lot of interesting thoughts here; thanks for your comment. I will try to give some open responses.
      In general I agree there is a lot of immaturity in society, although I’m not sure if I would agree that almost everyone is immature. My experience working with many parents of children at a school has led me to feel differently about that; many adults have a significant degree of maturity and strength; it varies along a continuum. I wouldn’t say that struggling through adversity necessarily makes me or others like me more mature than people who had more secure childhoods; perhaps it confers a different kind of maturity?
      I was aggressive toward my sister, usually verbally and occasionally physically, many, many times, so you will have to imagine this! Eventually I stopped these behaviors because I felt guilty. The mistreatment of my sister happened because my father was physically beating and verbally abusing me so many times, and being scared of him I could only transfer my rage onto my sister. I would say that such behavior is usually understandable if not “excusable” – people do have a (theoretical) choice, but in the case of severe neglect and abuse, they may be overwhelmed so greatly or so unaware of what they are doing that their ability to choose is greatly impaired. Also, as you know just because someone is chronologically an adult doesn’t mean they are psychologically an adult with a mature adult’s ability to discriminate, control impulses, and choose wisely. Maybe I’m a bit of a determinist in this way, but I’m not pessimistic. I think people do the best they can and that if they have more support, their ability to make good choices will increase.
      IMO “schizophrenia” or psychotic states are a continuation of the BPD continuum; I don’t feel there is a clear dividing line between severe borderline states and the beginning of psychotic states (but someone can be more clearly in a psychotic anomalous way of experiencing the world, or can be more clearly in a troubled but consensus “borderline” way of viewing the world). Personalities have psychotic/non-psychotic parts and the relative balance between them changes constantly. There are good books about this such as Rethinking Madness by Paris Williams, and the Infantile Psychotic Self and Its Fates by Vamik Volkan; in that book Volkan described how to help a schizophrenic person evolve into a borderline personality organization and then beyond that to a healthier personality. In terms of entering a more psychotic state / withdrawing from consensus reality, in my opinion whatever stress causes a person to feel overwhelmed and unable to cope will be the factor making such a choice more likely.
      I’m not sure if I understood the end of your message. If you’d like to discuss anymore feel free to email me at bpdtransformation (at) gmail (dot) com. I regret the funds are a challenge, but if you want to get more help, perhaps you live in an area where there are good training analysts available, meaning younger therapists supervised by an experienced analyst, who will often do good work at a sliding scale / reduced fee. Many people don’t know about these resources.

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      1. Yehudis Rabinovitz

        Thank you for replying so promptly, and for the incisive answers. The end of the message is probably a symptom of the problem so it doesn’t matter right now. What I would like to ask is what to do when there doesn’t seem to be any decent therapist around at all. You’ve written that you don’t believe that therapy is necessarily crucial for recovery – but what then? Over the years of trying to find someone to help my husband, I’ve been disappointed time and again until I all but came to the conclusion that somehow, I have to figure out how to be the person to help him – which is kind-of ridiculous since I have many of the same problems though not as far along the spectrum as him. Are there any books you would recommend? Do you see it as possible for 2 people both “BPD” to form that positive, nurturing relationship with each other that could enable them both to heal, or is it a losing proposition from the outset?

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      2. bpdtransformation Post author

        First of all, check out Clare’s blog – tacklingbpddotcom.wordpress.com – that is the best guide to how to recover from borderline states without therapy. She recommends many good books she used to reparent herself.
        I like the books the Angry Heart (Santoro), Repeat After Me (Claudia Black), Toxic Parents, among others.
        Second, if you can access some sort of therapy, do so…. What part of the world are you in, if I may ask? Without knowing more about your approximate location I can’t offer any advice. Don’t rule out the possibility that a move might help… I would say that, although it could be completely wrong.
        Yes, it’s definitely possible for 2 people with borderline issues to form a positive nurturing relationship with each other? Why wouldn’t it be… if they both have some level of motivation and some awareness of what issues they need to work on, sure. You definitely have those things.
        Lastly, it’s obvious but a strong degree of recovery does require a lot of interpersonal resources. That can come in the form of a therapist or not. If you don’t have a therapist, what other resource do you have? You have each other… can you also use a church community, or 12-step groups, or one or two trusted friends from some other social community you are part of? I can’t say much more without knowing what country / city you’re located in. If I could know that I might have some more ideas. But the idea is how to acquire and convert people who are presently only potential (or unknown) helpers into active helpers who can give you love and support. My friends calls this “enlistment” of supporters for recovery.

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  9. nicole

    Hi there,
    I am so glad I have found your blog/website. Last year I was diagnosed with BPD after being in treatment for a very long time, and now feel quite confused and upset to be labeled with this. I am a bit lost as to what to do, because I don’t believe I have it, and like yourself, I don’t believe its a valid psychiatric condition. What I can’t understand is why it took the psychiatrist so long to tell me and I struggle to accept this because I feel I have been taken advantage of. I live in Australia in Queensland and wondering if you know any experienced people in the field that treats clients with BPD and how to go about a proper assessment.

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Hi Nicole – Thanks for your message, can you email me at bpdtransformation (at) gmail (dot) com ? Then we could communicate better. I don’t necessarily have an answer for who you should see but can share some specific ideas from my experience seeking out a therapist that might help you in finding someone. In the general area you are in, there should be good people if you know where to look. Also perhaps you can tell me a little bit about your background and current environment, to whatever degree you’re comfortable sharing.

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  10. Pingback: #27 – The Kleinian Approach to Understanding and Healing Borderline Mental States | BPD Transformation

  11. Jay

    I’m not sure if you’re still active on this site or not but I needed to write a note of thanks to you. This website, along with about two years of solid psychodynamic relational psychotherapy have absolutely revolutionized my life. This website has been pivotal in realizing that I CAN recover. That I am able to! Beyond that, the clarity of the information you provided here has been a huge asset to me. You’ve basically done all the research for me! This website is a very important resource for people who struggle with aspects of what’s commonly referred to as BPD traits. My sincere thanks to you and the hours of work you’ve put into this. I for one, am a life that has been deeply changed as a result of it. Thank you.

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Jay, thank you for your comment and very glad to hear you got better! I am still here… and still doing well too. In fact I am working on a site about psychosis / “schizophrenia” right now, along the same lines as this one. But yes, having accurate information that developmentally early / borderline states of mind can be healed and overcome is very important; hope is crucial. I’m glad I was able to help with that. And best of luck to you.

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  12. Courtney

    I would like to thank you for writing this. I have never received an official diagnosis & I have been labeled depressed & given medication as such. I am 29 & certain that I have met the man I want to marry, yet I have crazy spiraling low self esteem & jealousy thoughts that threaten us all the time even when I resolve to do better. I am trying to follow dbt to improve my symptoms. My SO jokes that I am crazy but he loves me & accepts my symptoms as part of me. I believe him. I guess I hope I can continue to make progress handling my emotions. Regular exercise helps a lot. Healthy diet & enough food. Taking care of my self esteem by taking care of myself. Will I be ok?

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Hi Courtney, thanks for your message; it sounds like you already know a lot about what can help you. I would not give much importance to any of these pathological labels like “borderline” or “major depression”, nor would I conceptualize problems in handling our feelings or in functioning as “symptoms” (of an illness). Anyone can feel jealous or have low self-esteem depending on what we have been through; it is not an illness, let alone incurable. With supportive people like your boyfriend and others around you you should have every chance to do well! I wish you good luck.

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  13. Pingback: Too much to cope with alone | Emerging From The Dark Night

  14. Kevin Lees

    I found myself intrigued by your blog Edward which I thoroughly enjoyed reading. Your feelings and intellectualisation and life experience is as a view from an open window, all senses are touched and the mind is set free by the ‘in the moment’ experience.

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    1. bpdtransformation Post author

      Thanks Kevin… this was me writing years ago, about four years ago here, under my pen name Edward… you have seen me under my real name on that FB group. The basis of this blog is as I shared there, the Fairbairnian psychoanalytic / object-relations approach to developmentally early mental states. It is really powerful and hopeful. I have to credit my reading of it for a lot of what I was able to work on in therapy. I encourage you to check out those books I shared on FB.

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